August 14, 2010

Riding To My Sister's

Yesterday my sister called about having me over at her house.  I wanted to go but sometimes I can't drive.  It's not because I'm lazy or expect a chauffeur.  I suffer from panic disorder which is a result from the car accident I was in.  There are times when I feel completely normal and capable of being on the road.  If I have the slightest hesitation, I don't drive.  I tried to just suffer through it a few times but my fear would take over and I would do something stupid and scare myself.  I hate to put so much of a burden on those around me but I don't want anyone to get hurt, so I think it's safer just to stay out of the drivers seat at times.  Maybe I should get Personal Number Plates that say "watch it" or "danger".  That way other drivers would at least have a warning that there's a crazy lady on the road.  Anyway, my sister ended up coming to pick me up and brought me home.  Luckily, it's only a five minute drive to her house.  I got to spend time with her and my wonderful little nephew.  When she dropped me back off at home, I got the the classic country twang "bye" from my favorite little man.

Bookmark and Share


Mary Ann said...

I am so with you on this, thought it was just me lol
Anxiety (or GAD) runs in my birth family, and sometimes I am *ok* with driving, sometimes I am not.

I know what you mean about being concerned that your OWN nervousness/anxiety would precipitate an accident. I'm a very good driver, but I lack the courage to handle interstates - there are just too many vehicles going WAY too fast for me lol

My other phobia/anxiety is pain/doctors. I'll suffer at home and procrastinate because I'm scared to death of the drs causing me *more* pain ... and like you, both are rooted in past experiences. Kinda like post-traumatic stress, I guess :P

Ah well, we do what we can, when we can, right?!

Just remember, you're not alone feeling this way ~ :)

Mary Ann

clschaan said...

I have general anxiety disorder .. there was a whole 2 years when i couldn't drive over ANY bridges .. it was retarded

Martha Lawson said...

I've been there, also! I could drive as long as it was in my small town, but no way would I drive out of town by myself! Finally I got over it. Still have the occasional panic attacks tho, just not about driving.